My name is Rita, and I’m 38. For the past ten years, I’ve been crushing my remote job—my performance is solid, my team is happy, and my availability has never been an issue. Remote work isn’t a simple perk for me; it’s the only way I can safely keep both my job and my bedridden mother cared for, as I am her sole caregiver.
Last week, my boss called me out of the blue with a non-negotiable ultimatum. I must return to the office full-time, starting immediately. Not hybrid, not flexible hours—full-time presence required. When I explained that this wasn’t possible due to my critical caregiving responsibilities, he cut me off. He said plainly, “If you want to keep your job, you need to find a way.”
So, I decided to find his way.
The next morning, I walked into the office as ordered. Everyone stared because no one had seen me in person for years. My boss was already entrenched in one of his usual “don’t bother me” moods. I walked straight to his desk, placed a professionally printed invoice for my mother’s care directly in front of him, and made my demand.
“Here is the exact monthly cost for a professional sitter for my mother,” I stated in a calm, clear voice. “Since I am required to be here now, I’ll need this amount added to my salary so I can afford her full-time care.”
About ten people heard the entire exchange. I can tell you, you could have heard a pin drop in that room. He froze completely. He knew that if he denied the request right then, in front of his entire staff, he would look like the guy who forces an employee to abandon her bedridden mother just to satisfy his whims for “bodies back in the office.”
He quickly told me we’d “discuss it privately,” but I didn’t budge from his desk. I insisted it had to be made official, and on paper, because I simply can’t afford to lose a huge chunk of my income just to satisfy his sudden mandate. I saw a couple of my coworkers actually nod their heads in solidarity, which I knew only annoyed him more.
Fast-forward to the very next day: HR called me in. They informed me they were “willing to cover half the sitter cost.” Half. Which still means I lose a significant portion of my paycheck every single month. At that point, working from the office becomes a financial punishment, not a requirement. I explained the extreme financial strain this puts on me, but they kept repeating corporate buzzwords like “policy,” “precedent,” and “budget.”
Now I’m completely stuck. If I say yes to the half-offer, I basically take a substantial pay cut just to appease my boss’s preference—and I still have to juggle my mom’s critical care with a stranger I can barely afford. If I refuse the full-time demand, I risk losing the stable, well-paid job I’ve held successfully for a decade. I am truly trapped between sacrificing my necessary income and sacrificing my career.
