Ever since my parents told me that I was allergic to both milk and chocolate, I avoided them. The story was that I broke into severe hives on my first Halloween after eating milk chocolate, and I was rushed to the hospital where I was diagnosed with both chocolate and milk allergies. From then on, I was not allowed to eat anything containing chocolate or cow’s milk.
Over the summer, one of my college friends invited me to stay with her for a few weeks. While in her state, I visited my Godmother/Aunt, whom I hadn’t seen in years. We spent a day hiking and catching up. At lunch, my Aunt offered granola bars with chocolate, which I declined, explaining the allergy. She was surprised and told me I had never been allergic to chocolate, and that my mom had fabricated the story. She explained that I had once gotten ill from daycare, and my mom tried to sue the daycare owner for unrelated reasons. My mom invented the chocolate allergy story, hoping the daycare would feed me chocolate so she could sue. When that failed, she added a milk allergy claim. When confronted, she cut off contact with my aunt.
I was shocked. Later, I ate one of the granola bars and had no reaction. Upset, I called my dad.
The conversation went like this:
Me: “Dad, were you aware that I am not actually allergic to chocolate and milk like you and mom have said?”
Dad: “Don’t be ridiculous. You’ve never been able to eat chocolate without a reaction. Why would we make that up?”
Me: “I was just asking if you knew I don’t have the allergy. I ate chocolate and had no reaction. Did I ever get allergy tests?”
Dad: “I’ll have to ask your mother. I’m upset you’re calling us liars.”
Me: “I didn’t say anyone was lying. I just want to know if I had a real test.”
Mom joined the call.
Mom: “Don’t you remember you had hives at your 10th birthday party? Your friend gave you a tootsie pop and you reacted.”
Me: “I never had a 10th birthday party. I was at summer camp. I just want to know if I had a real allergy test, because I ate chocolate without a reaction.”
Mom: “You can’t eat chocolate because we say you can’t. You’re being a liar right now. How dare you say we never gave you a birthday party. You’ve always been ungrateful.”
Me: “I know I never had a 10th birthday party because I was at camp. Why are you trying to make me believe otherwise?”
My mom then started yelling, so I hung up. She called me repeatedly afterward. My aunt, watching this unfold, told me this was why she had no relationship with my mother—because of her pattern of lying and manipulation.
I was disturbed by the situation. The conversation felt surreal, and I don’t think I want to talk to them again, fearing they will try to manipulate me further.
My parents told me I was allergic to chocolate and milk. My aunt revealed my mom invented the story to sue a daycare. I ate chocolate and was fine. When I confronted my parents, they denied it and tried to invent false memories. I’m considering cutting them out of my life.
