My daughter-in-law texted me asking for another large loan, no explanation, just a number. This wasn’t the first time, and I was tired of the pattern. Instead of refusing outright, I invited her over. Calmly, I told her, “Of course I’ll help—if you show me your budget and sign a repayment plan.”
She laughed, certain I was joking. When she saw I was serious, her smile dropped. She accused me of not trusting her. I explained that I trusted her to live her life, but my money wasn’t a gift—it came with accountability.
Angry, she stormed out. Later, my son texted saying I had embarrassed her. Maybe I did. But I also kept my boundaries, and the money stayed in my account.
Helping family doesn’t mean enabling bad habits. Sometimes, saying “yes, but with terms” is the most loving answer of all.
